You ungrateful son of a bitch

I was feeling pretty sorry for myself today. I had an appointment at the dentist, which I knew was going to be a marathon sitting. I thought I was getting five fillings done, some of which were replacements for old, decaying fillings.

Turns out I was getting four filling and one crown preparation. Ick. Since I just had a crown put on a different tooth a few months ago, I knew what it involved. (Preparing for a crown involves shaving down most of the tooth until it's just a nub ready to accept the crown cover, and also cutting away gum tissue to make room for the adhesion of a crown.) I was internally panicking a little ...about the cost as much as the procedure... and I was feeling awfully sorry for myself.

Poor me.
Why is this happening to me?

Why have I been cursed with dental problems all my life?

I do everything I'm supposed to do, and this STILL happens to me?

This is so expensive, how will I afford it?

I'm going to be paying down dental work for the rest of my life.

I'm scared.

I don't want to sit through all this.

What if I have a panic attack in the chair?

I hate getting bad news!

It seems like I am always getting horrible news about how everything is horrible!

It really sucks to be me today.

And then, I overheard a conversation one of the dentist's assistants was having on the phone.

(Note that we had a snow/ice/sleet/freezing rain storm today in our area, and apparently I was the only patient to show up in the office this particular morning. )

Dentist's Employee, on the phone: "What happened? Where ARE you? What? Oh my god, Dan. Did you call 911? You need to get off the phone with me right now and call 911. Where are you? Are you on the road or off the road? What? You lost consciousness? Oh my god. Do you know where you are? Where are you right now?"

The other employees started murmuring "he was in a car accident.... he hit his head.... lost consciousness...."

Suddenly I felt really stupid and pathetic for feeling so sorry for myself for facing a DENTAL PROCEDURE.

Things easily be a lot worse.

There's always someone out there who has it worse than you, and you don't have to look very far to find that someone.

Later that day, I was at the bar, since I had been very pious for well over a week in anticipation for my marathon dental work. I had told myself I could go out and have a few drinks once I made it through. And I did exactly that.

The bartender (who happened to be my fiance) made a comment about feeling old, simply because a former student of his was in the bar, drinking. Legally.

I scolded him. "When you're 80, you're going to look back at yourself at 35 and hate yourself for thinking you were old. You're supple and strong and healthy and free of major ailments. You are young. When you're 80 years old and wrinkly and infirm, you can complain about being old. Not before."

I was giving a speech aloud to someone that I could/should be giving myself.

I'm still young. I'm healthy. I am blessed in many, many ways.

I shouldn't complain/bitch/whine about anything.

I should wear a rubber band around my wrist and snap myself every time I complain about something. Because I don't want to be an ungrateful S.O.B.

We aren't thankful because we're happy. We're happy because we're thankful.

Be thankful for something today.